Friday, July 26, 2013

The Wedding Drunk

     Drinking at a New Orleans wedding is not uncommon; as a matter of fact, I’ve never actually been a part of a “dry” reception (and I am definitely okay with that).  Because I know emotions are high, I always keep an eye on the bride throughout the night to make sure that she’s having fun, but not having so much fun that she does not remember what happened at the reception!  I’ve been known to water down a drink or two, but honestly, I have not had a problem with the bride or groom getting too drunk or too out of control.  The issues that I’ve seen with drinking come from the guests attending the weddings. 

     A few weeks ago, the band had an iPOD playing during one of their breaks.  The bride decided, very last minute, that she would like to throw the bouquet right then and there while the band was breaking, that way she wouldn’t have to break into their play time upon their return.  Of course, we turned off the iPOD and asked all the single ladies to come to the dance floor.  One of the bridesmaids was upset that we turned off the iPOD, which happened to be playing what was apparently her “favorite song”.  She almost ripped the microphone from the singer’s hand and started screaming profanities because she wanted to hear the rest of her “favorite song”. She eventually got pulled off the dance floor by one of her friends, but spent the rest of the night brooding and giving “evil eyes” to the band and I. 

     Then, there was a bride’s sister who threw a fit at the end of the reception because she wanted the band to play longer, but the reception was over.  The parents were not willing to pay the band extra to stay nor would they pay the venue for the extra time, so we ended as scheduled.  This concept was so hard for this bride’s sister to comprehend that she pretty much lost it on the dance floor.  She was screaming profanities because we “closed the reception” and her parents supposedly “paid enough money to get whatever they want”.  I would have expected the bride’s parents to step in, but I’m afraid they were not in much better shape than their intoxicated daughter, so the vendors just listened to her bash us as we broke down the reception and got out of there.
     I have seen guests go head-to-head with the band, the DJ, the photographer and even the rental company picking up chairs at the end of the night.  When attending a wedding, please know that you are a guest; I repeat, a guest.  That means that you have not paid any money to attend this fabulous party.  This in turn means that you have no idea what the plan is in terms of timeline, music choices, events for the night or even who should be where at what time.  Just because you are the sister of the bride doesn’t mean you know what time the photographer is scheduled to leave the reception.  And even though you are the groom’s mother, you might not be aware that your son specifically requested not to have “We Are Family” played at his reception – UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE.
     As a wedding guest, when you find yourself in a confrontation, especially with a vendor, please think back to this blog and remember these things:

1.       We have not been drinking all night (well, most of us haven’t), but you have been drinking since you were getting dressed 7 hours ago. So who do you think has a clearer grasp on the situation?
2.       We are trying to get a job done, a job that has been in the works for, on average, a year and you know nothing about the details.
3.       Even though every situation is different, I feel pretty secure saying that you are definitely embarrassing yourself and making a scene which will only have people talking about you, not us.
4.       Whatever you are upset about is bigger in your mind than it is in reality, so let it go!

     Also know that while most of the time, in my experience, the angry drunk is female, there’s also the aggressive drunk, who is male.  Let me speak for all female vendors when I say that we do not want to dance with you, we do not need you to “buy” us a free drink, we do not need you to be our date for the night and we certainly do not need you to take us out after the wedding.  Again, I am sober, so you slobbering all over me is not attractive.  And I must repeat one more time that I am working and here to do a job, not to get a date (well, that last one pertains to most vendors, but not all of them, so it might be worth a shot!).